it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Randomize
