I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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