i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
