The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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