Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
