Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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