The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize