i just wanna soil my oats bro
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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