After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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