So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
