sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
