He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
