There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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