I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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