Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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