Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
