Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize