You work out of a Hotel?
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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