i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
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