you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
