so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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