YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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