I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize