Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize