dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
