He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
