the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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