He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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