where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
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