In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
