im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
