Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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