real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
