READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
