No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Randomize
