Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
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