He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
