It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
