Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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