Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
