adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
