dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
