So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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