You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize