in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
