i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
