I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Randomize
