I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
