Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize