this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
