porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
